Well, we had another prenatal visit with Dr. T.  I always dread them.  I never know what to ask, say, or do.  

I had my prenatal first this time, backwards for me, but it showed I only gained 1/2 a lb in 12 days!  YEAH! (I swear I gain less when I eat junk food, like McDonald's & Taco Bell).  My blood pressure was normal, still high for me 124/76, but they are content with me carrying twins with that blood pressure, so I try not to sweat it.  My fundal height is now measuring 39!!! Yes, I'm measuring 39 weeks at 25 weeks and 5 days.  That seems insane, but it's true.  I gave the nurse a hard time over it.  I made her measure again and so she had my mom verify this time.  So, I looked down, and sure enough, 39.  I couldn't believe it.  I knew I was aching and having a difficult time bending over, but I had no idea!  I really feel great considering, and let's hope so... I have 11 weeks to go.

We also had a cervical check, which involves an ultrasound.  My cervix is still measuring great at 3.7cm and no funneling.  I'm so happy to know this.  They also measured Reagan's bladder and both of their heartbeats.  They both measured at 153.  Reagan's bladder measured bigger again.  Unfortunately, it doesn't look like Reagan is going to make it.  Dr. T told us only a miracle could save her.  We know this, but we still hold out a very small glimmer of hope that maybe medical knowledge is wrong.  I just hate to see her suffer.  I know she has adapted to her surrounding, but it doesn't matter...it still looks like she is suffering in there.

We discussed a little bit about delivery.  Just some preliminary things.  We would be allowed to spend as much time with Reagan as possible, but Dr. T said they would likely recommend not to ventilate her.  I asked her if she "could" be ventilated, would they do it and what things long-term and short-term are we looking at. She had told us a few weeks ago that her pulmonary hypoplasia could be so severe that she would not be able to be ventilated, but there is always the possibility for a miracle.  She told us as we get closer, we'll speak more detailed with a neonatalogist to see what our options are there.  Otherwise, she could live an hour or a day, but likely not much longer than a couple hours.  We have known all this and we haven't ignored it, but we hold out the one thing we have left for our little girl.....HOPE.   While we had this discussion, I saw one her staff over her shoulder just looking at us and shaking her head.  I guess she was simply saying no mother and father should have to do this and should have to see this.  

For now, Addy is safe and doing well and we'll still likely deliver c-section because of my Crohn's and prior retinal detachment.   For now, we just ask for prayers....Prayers that God has a better plan for this little girl.  She deserves so much more than this.